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Day 93: Love is love

Updated: Dec 26, 2021

A couple of days ago, the Federal Court struck down the Indiana ban against gay marriage. It was a happy day for gay, straight, bi, queer, trans…anyone who believes in the mantra “love is love”.

This past legislative session, I had the privilege of spending several days at the Statehouse chanting…listening…willing our legislators to support this motto…to get out of Hoosier bedrooms and focus on issues deserving of their attention.

During this experience, I got to hear testimonial after testimonial…love story and love story…plea after plea…for their love to simply be recognized no different than it was for straights…no different than it was for me.

So on Wednesday, when it happened, people flocked to the City/County Building to get their marriage licenses. To finally make their love for one another “official” in the eyes of the state. From a legal perspective, this provides so many needed protections for the individual…the couple…their family. Knowing that this allows some to sleep easier at night…to take a giant step forward in feeling equally recognized…makes my heart burst.

But I would like to offer some words of caution…just because you can marry, doesn’t mean you should impulsive run downtown and do it. Straight Hoosiers have been facing this dilemma for years.

How do you know when you are ready? When have we been together long enough? What are the signs to show us that now is the time? There is no magic algorithm…no definite sign. Love is a leap of faith and marriage is the work that comes after you jump.

So to all those beautiful couples that are riding the whirlwind of excitement, listen to your hearts. Grab your loved one’s hand and ask yourself if now is the time. If it is, go do it! If it’s not the time just yet, patiently wait.

As someone who’s been married twice, I hope my third…and your first…or second…or whatever…is the one that finally lasts. Because when the excitement of the moment…of the big day…fades away, you’re simply left with your partner…your lover…your best friend. And I hope that’s more than enough. It’s true…love is love…but a successful marriage is work.

Best of luck to all that took the plunge…are in line to take it today…or are planning to take it at some point in the future. Despite my luck so far, I think committing yourself to someone is a beautiful thing. Wishing y’all a lifetime of happiness!

In the meantime, enjoy the song…and the video. It circulated several years ago on Facebook and made me cry the first time I saw it. I’ve been watching all sorts of Marry You vids this morning…great lip syncs…choreographed dancing…flash mobs…vids with kids…but I couldn’t find any with two men or two women making this song their own. I look forward to the day YouTube is flooded with them. After all…love is love.


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