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Day 195: Open for business

Updated: Jan 3, 2022


As luck would have it, about an hour before my appointment I started to feel flush…got the chills…felt achey.  At first I assumed I was picking up someone else’s energy but when I dismissed that I was left with the realization that I was going to have to push past my aches to be there for someone else.

I haven’t had to dig deep like that in a while…at least not from a work perspective.  As a retiree, I pretty much have the ability to do what I want when I want and if I need to reschedule something, I do.  I don’t have the weight of feeling that others are counting on me to do a job anymore…until today.

Maybe that was the fever I was feeling.  Some left over sensation of obligation…responsibility…and how that used to feel for me.  Doing something that I don’t want to do has always left me with a physical sensation…even resulting in full on body aches…so here I was again.

When I walked out of the session, though, I still felt feverish but I didn’t feel heavy.  I didn’t have that gnawing feeling in the pit of my stomach.  Despite the flu aches, I felt accomplished.  I had taken a huge step in fulfilling a dream of being a life coach…I’d had my first client.  I had survived…the client survived…it felt good.

And if I’m honest, it was awesome to have on regular clothes again.  I mean, I don’t always wear yoga clothes…but unless I’m dressing up to go out for something, I do…and that meant this was something!

About halfway through the session, I was struck by the fact that this is my new job…and I was doing it.  Someone was trusting me…allowing me to listen and offer guidance.  Someone was sharing a part of themselves with the purpose of growing.  I had to quickly check out of my thoughts to stay present but in that brief moment, I was nearly overwhelmed.

Following a dream feels amazing….finding your path feels surreal, yet natural…even when you’re sick.


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